in the morning and amazing.

i've been feeling really kind of lost lately. during the week i bury myself in school work so that i'm distracted and don't think about how lonely i really am. friday comes and i'm free again. spring break starts this friday so i'll be galavanting for the next week and a half. i want to have adventures. plus i'm really starting to get annoyed with my roommate so i'm happy i won't have to sleep in the same room with her for a while.

my weekend was fantastic. i layed in bed for 3 days with a fantastic guy. watched movies, drank beer, smoked cigarettes, loved life. things are getting better i think. i feel better atleast. i really do think that someone who makes me feel better is what i need all the time. it may not be the same person all the time and that's what bothers me. i know this will eventually end and he won't be the one who makes me happy anymore. i'll try not to think about that. all i think about now is the feeling i had waking up on monday morning at 11 am in his bed with him next to me, with the sunlight streaming in and the breeze blowing the curtains. everything was calm and everything was exactly how it should have been.